"If it had not been for the Lord who was on our side"

In Psalm 124 David celebrates the sweet victory that comes when the Lord of heaven and earth is on your side. I’ve experienced this power, this strength that comes from the same God that rescued a multitude of people from genocide, slavery and death. A God that is powerful enough to deliver a nation from their enemies (time and again) is the God that I serve; the only one that gives me the strength I need to do what He has called me to do. David repeats this phrase: “If it had not been the Lord who was on our side.” Then they would have been defeated- annihilated at that. I can plug that phrase into my own life. If it had not been the Lord who was on my side, I would not have made it through my first week of teaching! If it had not been the Lord who was on my side, I would not have had the patience I desperately needed at times. If it had not been the Lord who was on my side, I would not have been able to fight the temptation of self pity and self doubt. If it had not been for the Lord, I would be at a loss. A detrimental loss. Praise God- the God of heaven and earth- the God of Israel- the God that saved a nation from destruction, a human race from eternal death, and me: a girl struggling to fit her role as a teacher and role model to a couple hundred kids in Lima, Peru. A God so magnanimous, yet so personal. If it had not been the Lord who was on my side… I would hate to think of the life I’d be living- or NOT living in that case. I’m thankful for the struggles and the challenges, but only because I know that I have an almighty God on my side that is fighting for me. Friends, I have great news… “Our help is in the name of the Lord, who made heaven and earth.” Psalm 124:8. 

What Matters Most

It's been 3 weeks since I arrived in Peru. Since then I've met more people than I can count, eaten some of the most delicious food there is to be tasted, experienced the responsibilities that come with being a first time teacher, worked on a construction site, killed two scorpions, and seen God answer prayers in ways I needed it most. While my transition has been fairly easy, it still presents inevitable challenges, but not physical, or cultural challenges necessarily, though those are unavoidable.  I found the biggest challenge to be within myself. A battle of what to believe. "Can I really do this?" You have no experience. "Will they like me?" Everyone has told you how tough these kids are going to be. "What if I mess up? Terribly?" Don't be surprised when you fail. But God patiently- and repeatedly- battles for my thoughts by reminding me, "I've called you here for a purpose." "Love them like I have loved you, despite their reactions." "I will give you strength. I will work through you." When I look solely at myself, my capabilities, my experience, my strength, the task before me is overwhelmingly scary. But I'm quickly learning that fear conquers little.
What I thought mattered most was doing a good job, being a good teacher. Successfully taking over a position and not disappointing my superiors. Running an impeccable program that the school (and I) could be proud of. Bad desires? No. But what really matters most? Galatians 1:10 "For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ." I'm afraid to fail because I'm afraid to look bad. I'm afraid I'll be embarrassed in front of peers, and teachers, and parents. But, what matters most is that my life, my job, my attitude, my efforts, my relationships- absolutely everything- honors Christ, and is motivated by Christ. If I do that, I cannot fail. Sure, perhaps the unit I planned on baseball turns out to be a disaster, but will my students see Christ reflected in me? Will they see a God that truly loves them? That's my purpose. That's my goal. That's my motivation. And that's what matters most.